Writing this post, I'm singing "Secrets" by OneRepublic in my mind.
Hitting for a black coffee on a Monday morning getting you like questioning your existence and realising you are possibly holding the darkest secret in the family, enough to eat you alive for 9 years of your live so far.
I’m not one for this sugar coated BS of smalltalk. Let’s just quit the bull shit.
I believe all families have secrets, some some worse than others. Either way, all families have one thing for certain in common regardless of their secret- no one will dare to tell the secret.
It pains to have to hide/protect against loved ones in fear of hurt, pain or disappointment up until the point it makes the arrow conceal said secret for years with no obvious route ahead.
Miles long and full of nettles. Your only route is to hold back wishing to see the other side, or get hurt going through the nettles. But what is inside this bush? Both mental and physical. Your going to get hurt either way and you won’t win this.
There are many versions of the truth; many are formed upon the main truth and are further modified based on speculation.
The truth is hard to bite. Once you know, you know. There is no going back. And what do you do with the truth is questionable.
It comes to a point where this dark secret is screaming as loud as it can let no one is listening. And that’s because no-one recognises its voice. Pain, fear – it’s the same voice just a different tone.
The truth has to come out, but in who’s voice and what will be the effect of this and how many lives will be destroyed because of this?
Can life get back to “normal”, and is this sense of toxic normality healthy or are we just grabbing onto what we know or are we to create a new life away from this darkness?
Darkness. Around us all the time – you close your curtains, you close your door then your eyes. It’s just how.
“Keep your friends close, enemies closer” To protect our closest closer, is the question.